Esthee H.

I had the luxury of having Melbourne as my first stop in my little world tour. Shall not talk about virgin experience of first day at work, since it turned out to be pretty unpleasant. I was shaky and terrified and made all the mistakes a normal intelligent human being would never have made. And for some reason, once a mistake has been done, every other mistake seems amplified afterwards. It was quite a nightmare, really.

But all in one, it was a good learning experience and I swore never to make such mistakes ever again.
Thank god, I haven't. :D

But there's something else I'd like to highlight. Which is how my sweetheart stayed with me the night before and helped me as I panicked, realizing I didn't have this, didn't have that. He went around J8 buying my last minute essentials. He also willingly went to the 24-hr supermarket near my place to buy zip-lock bags at close to midnight, simply because I forgot about my LAGs. :(
He was so sweet to wake up at 6am to send me off in a cab downstairs, and stood under an umbrella in the rain to hail a cab and carry my luggage for me.

Plus a surprise good luck card on my first day at work!

-insert big grin-


Okay, enough about the mushy things.

Now more on my first stop - Melbourne, Australia!

This was view from my hotel room. Apparently my friend had an ever better view!




Night view. I like how brightly lit the outside is. I don't know, it just gives me a sense of comfort that the city isn't dead.



Here are some pictures I took while we went out the next day. Pretty scenic pictures because Melbourne is full of interesting, beautiful architecture!

I am so in love with the architecture, really. It's a nice blend of vintage historical feel with the modernity of the city. And I love how nice the pace of the traffic is (both car and human). It's just nice, not too rushed and a tad laid-back.












I was walking around and admiring the beauty of the surroundings and then I saw this on the road.

2 horses! 2 white gorgeous horses with a carriage! On a road in broad daylight.
Now where can you find this? Certainly not on the streets in Singapore.



I looked good and hard.
No prince charming in sight. So I moved on.
keke

Oh, this is taken in front of what I believe to be, Victoria Library. I didn't get a chance to go inside but I'm sure it's a library because I looked at the sign.

What are these birds, pigeons? Pardon me for my ignorance on birds, I really have no idea.

But they certainly remind me of scenes from western films, where people just sat in the park and feeding birds like these. The birds will just come flocking around them and sitting on their shoulders.

So this was a scene in the movies that came true for me.



That's me with my perfect mentor, Krystal!


We had Risotto and I-forgot-what's-the-other-one for lunch in one of the cafes in an alley. It was such a nice place even though it was in the alley. The alley had like a stretch of cafes and every single one of it was filled with people!
On a weekday lunch?!
Kristal told me this was where the Aussies have their lunch at during the lunch break.
And I was so amazed by how un-rushed they were. Nobody was gulping down their food and had time for steaks, chops and chats over coffee.



I also had the first Churros of my life.


After that, we made our way back to the hotel for a quick nap before reporting for work.

I took this picture when Jolene and Krystal were getting their ice-creams.


So I didn't get my ice-cream because I was still suffering from cramps.
The security guard at our hotel casino surprised me why asking me where was my ice-cream when we walked by.
I was surprised by his comment because I didn't expect him to talk to me at all so I answered awkwardly that I didn't want one.

Ok, my point really is... The friendliness of the Australians! Even the cashier at the supermarket greets and talk to you when you are fishing your purse for coins to pay for your grocery.

This is something we don't have and I certainly hope we can cultivate one fine day on this sunny island.

Okay, that's all for Melbourne, my first noob stop for my world tour. :D

More to come, so stay tuned!

I hope I can be dedicated to writing though.

So I found myself a job.

My first full time job, a step into the real world upon graduation. I remember pondering over my future as I was wrote my final year paper. The more I wrote, the more it came to me that I truly detested what I was doing. It was painful because I knew I loved literature. I loved reading and appreciating fine works by talented writers but it's different when you are thrown into a system (commonly known as the SG education system) and you know the toughest survives. The rest just float in dead waters. And it's precisely the fact that the country is so wrapped up with elitism and its warped sense of what elitism comprises, that made me decide I wanted something out of this country.

I looked at teaching overseas because that will mean that I get to go away and live elsewhere, and still put my major to good use. And then I realised that the only place that's affordable and still attractive to me is Korea. And Korea doesn't recognise Singapore as a native english-speaking country. WHUTTTTTT. Which means even if they do employ me, they can only employ me as teaching assistants while the Americans and the Europeans (mostly whose english isn't even their first language) will be the main teachers.

Poof. There goes the plan.

And I'm glad because here I am, with a job that brings me around the world, a different place a week, with lovely awesome hotels and meal allowances covered for. The bargain is, I work my ass off on the way there and back. Other than that, it's all good. I'm given ample rest, more than enough actually. I don't bring work home. I bring my camera around and snap snap snap. Even if I'm alone.

Another downside is that it's a job with an unpredictable schedule, which makes it hard for you to hang out with friends or arrange something. It's mostly private time, one room to yourself while overseas, or home alone on a lazy weekday. It can be good or bad I guess. For me, it's good and bad. It depends.


But one thing is,
I hate reporting for work at unearthly hours.

Okay, that's all I have.
Watch this space for my travel updates!

I am thankful for each and every friend that makes the effort to care and show their concern for me. These two weeks has been a really good time for me to catch up with friends and happenings in their lives since I've learnt that I would be starting work really soon. As time goes by and everyone moves on to different paths in life, it really takes the extra effort for people to maintain relationships.

Often, time passes by and things or people change. Sometimes you look back at some memory and reminisce the good times once shared. Sometimes, you smile, sometimes you feel sorry for the way things turned out. I don't quite know how to deal with this because it pains me when a relationship goes wrong but maybe, just maybe, it might be better to drop it and leave it the way it is. Afterall, the damage's done. How much are we willing to retract and face the broken pieces? Much less pick them up?

I am. I really am. But I can't do this by myself.

I don't know if it's a weakness or a strength, that I am so attached to relationships and emotions. It is hard for me to practise PR when it's only human to judge and value things and people differently. I wonder at people who have such great PR skills that everything and everyone seems to be of equal importance to them. It is an amazing ability and I do envy them for that. But sometimes I can't help but wonder if they really are sincere. But then again, I guess sincerity can't be faked and is most definitely easily felt.

These days, I try to be thankful for what I have and try to view things in my life as blessings. As the saying goes, Is your cup half full or half empty?, I try to take on a positive mindset with each brand new day. It's easy to feel sorry for yourself, but you could make it even easier by not doing so.

I'm thankful for a great deal of things in my life right now. :)

I remember browsing through the lit section in the school bookshop for a book on my final paper and I went through shelf after shelf of books, finding the title of each book so familiar. I then realise the extent of books I've read over the course of my 4 year course... Strange how I've always tried to recollect a good read but my mind goes to a blank and all I can think of is Harry Potter, but as I walked down the aisle looking at the lit texts, each one of them comes flashing back to my mind rather vividly. I feel a certain nostalgia for these texts, a sense of familiarity... but at the same time, a sense of pity for I really enjoyed reading these texts but I wished I read them for the sake of reading and not for the sake of examinations.

This is the love-hate relationship of being a student I guess. I'm thankful for the oppurtunity to study my area of interest more deeply, and I wouldn't have changed a different subject if I were to make my choice again. But the nature of Singapore's educational system has greatly murdered my passion for studies. I feel as I'm being forced to read and do my assignments in the way that would help me score the best, as opposed to genuinely studying and learning things. I know it's probably the same everywhere else, but this elitist state of thinking is not doing everyone good. There are other ways to excel for a person besides academics, and sadly, none of this can be appreciated in this state.. One can look up to you if you're rich, sure enough. But it isn't the same as being looked up to if you are smart.
But what really defines intelligence?

Pardon the deep thoughts about academic qualifications. I'm at a point when I've graduated and find myself at the crossroad, wondering which path to take. Failure at a couple of interviews is really nothing for a fresh grad right? Afterall, one's life can't always be smooth-sailing right? 

If you fall, you stand up and try again. If you fall again, stand up and try again. Yes, that's the way Miss Han! :) 

 

 

Celebrating 2 years of love with Mexican Food at Holland Village and a cake which proved we had no talents for artistic creation.








Mexican food was really delicious though! :D

Another birthday celebration, this time from the two best friends - Doris and potatoying!
It's funny how we all met each other at different stages in life but ended up as 3 good friends. I guess I'm really lucky to be have my 2 best friends meet each other randomly and still be able to come together to all become great buddies.

Thank you girls for everything. Everything that you've done for me. For all the years that we've been friends, you girls were always there. For tears, joy or laughter, you've always been there. I can't say more how much I appreciate the both of your presence in my life.

And as trying as life can be, I hope we will still remain this way for the rest of our lives. 

I may not have been the best friend for you guys, but I promise to be there anytime, anywhere for you girls, as long as you need me.

I spent my 23rd birthday in  Taiwan. It was a birthday treat I gave myself while on internship, because I thought I needed a vacation. It's not that I was dying to get away from my internship, it's just that juggling with the stress and fatigue from interning and
at the same time, being choreographer for 2 items at dancetitude was too much for me to handle. I was desperately wanting to get away from all of it, so I booked myself tickets to Taiwan, pushing aside the fact that school would have started and I'd be missing classes.

It was a 6 day trip to Taichung and Taipei with Taiyi. Being a very studious boy, my dear boyfriend thought it wouldn't be right to skip class plus he wasn't that keen on Taiwan. So he decided to join me over the weekend, just in time to celebrate my birthday for me there. Taiwan isn't the kind of place people like us could go for weekend getaways, so I was really pleased he was willing to come despite making noise about his unwillingness to skip class. So I thought this was my birthday and I was contented.

The craziness from dancetitude, his gout problem, as well as school and then leaving for Taiwan was pretty difficult for him to prepare anything for me. I honestly wasn't expecting anything because I knew he was burnt out from all of these, on top of that, having to pay a sum of money just to go to Taiwan to spend my birthday with me. Not to mention coming to my rescue when I shopped myself broke in Taiwan, I really wasn't expecting anything more. But he prepared my gift, a personally drawn portrait of the two of us colored with crayons on a small Junior shirt. It was the cutest and sweetest surprise. Even though the gift was really adorable, it was the effort despite the time constraint that made me feel really blessed. :) There was also a cute card and teddy that he bought me from Taiwan.







Here's us in Ximending, eating Ah Zhong Mee Sua like EVERY single time we walk by. It's that mothergood I tell you.

[caption id="attachment_290" align="alignnone" width="300"] Taipei, Taiwan[/caption]

Address right here:
Ay-Chung Flour-Rice Noodle / 阿宗麵線 (Ximending)
No.8-1 Emei Street, Taipei, Taiwan (Wanhua District)
Spending my birthday in Taiwan with a good friend and my boyfriend, together with the gifts that caught me by surprise, was more than what I'd asked for. A 23rd birthday was less exciting than the one before and I was contented simply  spending it in Taiwan with the company I had.

But one week later, I was surprised yet again. This time, all I was told was that we're going out on a date to watch something. No matter how I tried to dig from him, I couldn't guess it right. The suspense made me a tad frustrated but I'm glad he kept it a secret throughout.

It was only when we reached the entrance of the theatre, then I realized what I was in for. Cat 2 seats for Voyage La Dive at Resorts World! It's been decades since I watched a circus and the good seats made it even more awesome. I really enjoyed the show. :)











So it was a birthday that was celebrated over 3 weeks. Though I hadn't expect anything from it, I was still glad for the way it turned out. Thanks dear the wonderful celebration and irreplaceable gifts. And Taiyi for being so spontaneous and willing to go to Taiwan with me. The hotel bookings she settled for me plus the pretty flower soap she got me.

We are great shopping buddies but we hvav to watch.our wallets next time! Getting completely broke from shopping while overseas is so..... us. WTF.

It might not have been a grand celebration but I was contented. I appreciate all of it, especially what Simon has done for me. I t may not be the sort of glamorous celebration which the birthday girl gets blown away for the entire day but its something more subtle. Like chewing on marshmallows. (Does that quite describe it?)

Now I'm stressed about his birthday that's coming up in a month's time. It feels like I can never do enough for him.

:(

Thank you dear, for being the sweetie that you are. For bringing joy and happiness and bliss into my life.

Hi friends,

I've been wanting to write again for a long time after browsing through my laptop and remembered that I used to keep blogs. Reading the old blogs gave me a variety of odd feelings, as though the person who wrote them felt distant and yet strangely familiar. It made me feel silly for the things I did or the way i wrote. But as I read them, waves of nostalgia came crashing at me, for things that were once important, were sadly forgotten over the years.

As time went by, seeing the old me made me realize how drastic people could change over a span of few years, even months. Or weeks. I know that I am certainly not the same person I thought I would turn out to be in the past. I don't think it has much to do with growing up or maturing, but rather, I've changed my mentality, my perspective and perhaps the way I approach life. It just seems like nothing ever remains constant.

In any case, I'm starting afresh with this blog since the previous ones mark closures to the past. I'm not sure the kind of treatment I'll give to this blog, for that will depend on how life itself goes for me. I'll try to remain true but I suppose overly personal entries shall be made private with access given to certain people.

I guess the blog will serve as my way of giving quick updates about my life to friends, since now we've all grown up and are busy with our own lives. Or it could be a space for me to rant and ramble my random thoughts. Or perhaps serve to be a part of my memory, which I'll safekeep important moments of my life can revisit them in future.

Whatever it is, friends or acquaintances this, please do not judge me or rely on this to give you updates about me. I've always valued physical interaction tremendously.

With that, here's a brand new start to another chapter of my life. :)

Hello new life.